how to build a strong, biblical family

How to Build a Strong, Biblical Family

Matthew 19:3-6

Our families will not be any stronger than our individual family members. Our churches will not be any stronger than our families. Our nation will not be any stronger than our churches.

God’s Design for Marriage and Family

Matthew 19:4b-5

Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female,” and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”?

This is God’s design for healthy marriages—which are needed for building strong families.


To be married, a person is to leave father and mother. The marriage relationship supersedes the parent-child relationship. 

If you have poured all your love and time into your children, to the neglect of your spouse, when the empty nest comes, you will find you have an empty marriage.

Be Joined

The KJV says a man “shall cleave to his wife.” To cleave means to put together in a permanent relationship. You cannot please God by breaking up your home.

Become One Flesh

God has made husbands and wives one flesh, physically. “But did He not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring” (Malachi 2:15a). 

Husbands and wives are one flesh, psychologically. Your spouse is to be your friend, with whom you share your heart.

Husbands and wives are one flesh, spiritually. Pray together. As you do, God’s Spirit is binding your hearts together.  

Satan Destroys Family Unity

Matthew 19:9

I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”

Marriage is to be a permanent, lifelong covenant between one man and one woman. God does permit divorce if there is fornication—but even then, He does not command divorce. (Read Hosea 1:2-3, 3:1-2.)

What Does It Mean to Be in Love?

Love is something you can do if you wish to.

Behind every command of God is the power of God to carry it out. God has commanded you to love your spouse. (See Ephesians 5:25; Titus 2:4-5; Romans 5:8.) Unconditional love brings security into the family. This kind of love is not, primarily, an emotion. It is an act of the will.

False Excuses for Divorce

“There is constant arguing, so we need to separate for the children’s sake.” There is another option: get right with God! 

“I deserve to be happy.” God did not get you married so that you might be happy, but that you might be holy. You owe it to God, yourself, and your family to keep those vows.

“God wants me to.” Is God going to bend His Word just for you? Marriages are a covenant only to be ended by death.

Decide to Build a Strong Christian Family

If you have a broken home, God will forgive you, and cleanse the bitterness out of your heart. (See 1 John 1:7; Isaiah 1:18.)

Is this one article going to change your family? No—but it can help you decide: “By God’s grace, we can and will work it out.” 

Center your home on Christ. The devil is doing all he can to destroy your home. But if Christ is the core, a godly family will stand, because it is a house built upon a rock. (See Matthew 7:24.)

Feed your love. Love is like a flower that needs to be cultivated and fed. Never flirt with another man or woman—and never cease to flirt with your spouse. 

Be a testimony. A healthy family where husband and wife are together and the children are loved, will make a radical, dramatic testimony to those around you.

Known for his evangelistic zeal and uncompromising commitment to the Word of God, Adrian Rogers was one of the greatest preachers, respected Bible teachers, and Christian...

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